You see it all the time in the movies. When a boy accidentally brushes the girl’s hand and they both look into each other’s eyes, then they impulsively glance quickly away.
Many romance novels and movies bank on what is identified as ‘sexual tension’ to keep their stories interesting, and make the readers or viewers always on edge with elated anticipation on what’s going to happen next to their hero and heroine.
It’s the chemistry.
It’s the butterflies in the stomach, a blush, a smile on the inside, a laugh, a grin.
Sexual tension actually does not always lead to sex. It should not always lead to sex, although it usually does. To define it, sexual tension is that moment when two people experience an attraction towards each other, but the consummation is postponed or even sometimes never occurs. It is simply the chemistry between two people who like each other, but that desire is not explicitly expressed.
Sexual tension is also something that grows over time. Like when a boy and a girl share a platonic friendship, and every moment shared together seems to foster an intimacy that may make one or the other think of the other person in a way that is more than just friends. Sexual tension is also when people play the game of ‘signs’, making one think ‘Does he like me? Does he not?’
Here are some scenarios where sexual tension is being caused, played up or slowly (sometimes ever-so-slowly) being built by people both in the reel and real life:
Playing hard to get – This is a situation when the man pretends she does not like the girl. In certain scenarios, a guy may pretend to ignore the girl and act like a snob. For example, the girl is wearing a beautiful red dress and looks radiant. The guy ignores the girl, not even commenting or throwing a glance anywhere near her direction. Maybe other men are looking her way, but he simply doesn’t. The girl may feel pretty that day and may expect an admiring glance from the guy. This would cause her to maybe feel a little upset or wonder why the guy didn’t even look at her. This creates intrigue on part of the girl. Or a sense of bafflement – maybe for the too self-absorbed ones. Sometimes, the guy can also act unavailable, and this is at times more attractive to women, and increases sexual tension.
The Joker – This is when the guy cracks jokes to charm the girl with his sense of humor and wit. A guy can also give out an intelligent or creative insult. Now there are plenty. When a guy does this to the girl, the girl may have a ‘You did not just say that’ reaction. At times, this makes the girl feel challenged by the guy, and some girls like challenge. This just sparks sexual tension even more.
Casual touches – This is a situation where the guy ‘casually’ touches the girl, maybe brushing her arm while he is trying to reach for his bag on the table. This causes the girl to think ‘Did he really mean to do that? Does he…like me? Was there something there?’ The guy would just play it cool and act as if it was an accident, making the girl feel perplexed with the thousands of possibilities and conclusions racing in her head. The action creates an ambiguity. The girl may feel there are ‘mixed signals’ from the guy, and this just increases the sexual tension.